


A Universe Where We Are Meant to Be

by rhapshie



Category: Hikaru no Go
Genre: Alternate Reality, Gen, May 5, Multiverse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-05
Updated: 2018-05-05
Packaged: 2019-05-02 09:50:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,322
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14542107
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rhapshie/pseuds/rhapshie
Summary: The gods want to grant Hikaru's wish, they really do. Alas, they are unable to make the clock tick backwards, they are unable to grant life to a body that has returned to the Earth.They have to resort to the second best alternative.





	A Universe Where We Are Meant to Be

_"I'm nothing compared to him."_

The words were intelligible, yet curdled with a bitter mix of regret and spite, resignation and repugnance that seeped their way into his throat, clogging and jamming it with painful emotion that made his skin prickle and stomach churn. The echoes of the too-familiar voice lingered in the distance, far enough that he couldn't reach and grasp yet at the same time, close enough he could just taste it on the tip of his tongue, melting and searing his skin with unbearable anguish.

_"Can we do it over?"_

They weren't just  _words_. They were a harsh reality that had slithered and forced their way into his heart like a spear that pierced through his being and into the surface behind him, leaving him dangling in the air for an unforgiving eternity, waiting for the merciful death that would never come. He struggled again and again to no avail. Every movement he exerted to push himself over the edge proved to be futile as the echoes pushed him back once more, a little stronger each time until his back made contact with the wall, the tip of the spear.

_"...Take me back to the beginning..."_

Hikaru woke up with a violent jolt, his throat parched and sweat crawled underneath the fabric of his clothes despite the cool temperature enveloping him. Inside his ribcage, his heart thundered uncontrollably, the repulsive aftertaste of his dream lingered despite it being no more than intangible thoughts conjured by the unease that resided in the corner of his mind. With breathing still uneven and forced, he swallowed hard, then looked to the side.

It was as if he was gutted with a knife when he saw the ethereal figure of Sai seated in front of the Go-ban with a small desk light next to it, highlighting his pale skin and fair complexion. For some reason unknown to Hikaru, he failed to bring himself to lay his eyes upon the spirit without a knot forming inside his stomach.  _Just the aftereffect of the dream_ , he assured himself as he took a deep breath and settled back into his bed, this time drawing the blanket a little closer towards his chin as if it was capable of defending his head from the intrusive echoes of voice still resonating in his ears.

Sleep was no longer something that came easily to him that night as he laid on the bed, eyes wide open, the heartbeat that slowed down slightly would once again quicken when he heard the rustling of clothes behind him as a sign that Sai was re-adjusting himself. Hikaru wasn't entirely certain as to why he felt so very feverish and why his eyes stung whenever he took a glance at the spirit or even thought about him.

Hikaru tried his damndest to banish the disquiet back into the pit where it belonged and really, he almost succeeded as he relaxed and momentarily forgot about the peculiar dream that haunted him, instead opting to revel in an instructive Go against a few opponents. Throughout the entire event, Sai remained eerily silent untrue to the usual exuberant self that helped Hikaru to momentarily forget about the spirit's presence, but not for long as he was soon snapped back to reality when Ogata, in his drunken glory, approached Hikaru.

That was when his heart clenched once more. He could've sworn he had lived through this, like some sort of far-too realistic deja vu so tangible, it  _had_ to be real. Hikaru could hear a double of Sai's voice echoing in his eardrums, offering to play against the new Judan and he found himself trapped in a trance as he attempted to explore his dreams, wanting nothing more than to have a full grasp of the situation.

"Hikaru?"

The boy blinked, eyes out of focus and his lips were slightly wavering. "Uh, yeah. Sorry," He murmured then uncomfortably shifted his weight to his other foot. "Sai, I don't feel so good. I think I might call it a night." Whispered the boy after a short pause and he halted in his track, hastily excused himself to Ogata and stormed off before the man could stop him, a feat that he would undoubtedly perform given the opportunity.

Sai was no fool. He knew something was amiss with his student, something that induced Hikaru as much discomfort as the lingering thought of the evaporation of his soul did. However, Sai dared not question the boy about it. In the two years that they had the opportunity to know each other at an intimate level, no secrecy was ever present. They laid their emotion bare, not just because Sai couldn't do otherwise without involuntarily affecting Hikaru's mood, but mostly due to the trust they had in each other. They were a part of each other, literally.

With this in mind, Sai suppressed his desire to argue against his better judgement. Although he wanted to play that game against Ogata, despite the man in a state of severe intoxication, he didn't wish to impose on Hikaru's unease. It left a hole in his chest, knowing that he was to disappear without a match against a man whose passion for Go rivalled his.

However, none of it could compare to the anguish that would soon overcome him when he departed, as he knew that his time was nearing its end. It wasn't the inability to further play Go in the Earth that he was terrified of, but the notion that he had to leave behind what beautiful friendship he built together with Hikaru. He would no longer be able to play a direct role in mentoring the brilliant player or observe what would become of his rivalry with Akira. In a sense, Hikaru was just getting started and Sai had to let go of him.

That night, Sai didn't demand a game. Instead, he sat in front of an empty Go-ban, watching Hikaru continuously shuffle in his bed for hours until he was able to be still at last.

.

Hikaru's eyes snapped open and a sharp gasp followed after. He quickly fixed himself into a sitting position and held his hands up to observe them and curled them when he realised that he was no longer dreaming.

With his heart thundering violently in his chest, the boy glanced sideways tentatively and he could barely choke back a whimper. Illuminated thinly by the moonlight that spilled from the corner of the curtain, Sai sat, unmoving, his eyes closed but he was undoubtedly  _there._ It instilled a degree of relief and pain at the same time as Hikaru finally caved in, no longer able to brush off his dreams anymore. He was certain that they were not merely specks of his imagination, but a vision. One that was embedded in his head by the gods for reasons unknown to him.

Hikaru's breathing was steady by the time he peeled off the blanket from his body and tiptoed around Sai. The spirit remained dormant, seemingly asleep as Hikaru closed the bedroom door behind him.

It was all spur of the moment decision that led Hikaru to the front door of the Go Institution at 4 in the morning. The air outside was chilly and he regretted not taking a warm clothing article with him, but the thought died in his mind just as quickly as it surfaced as he felt the welcoming warmth of the institution.

As expected, no one was present. Hikaru walked towards the elevator only accompanied by dim lighting. He let out an agitated sigh as he drummed his fingers against his thigh, eyes never once leaving the level indicator just above the door. The usually comforting hum of the elevator turned deafening, the vibration became quakes and it would have unnerved the boy had he not been focusing on something else. His ears were ringing, it had been since the moment he jolted awake.

When the elevator chimed followed by the opening of the doors, Hikaru wasted no time in emerging out with his eyes only concentrated on what was in front of him. Despite it being dark, he knew exactly where he was heading: to the source of the echoes.

Deep down, Hikaru knew that it wasn't him who had control of his body. He was being led by someone else, by _something_  else. Whoever or whatever it was, they tied his hands and dragged him into the Go Institution by snaking their way into his core and instilling restlessness that he was certain would never fade unless he heeded the call.

Footsteps.

Hikaru turned his head, momentarily snapped out of the trance and he sharply exhaled. It was 4 AM and he wasn't anywhere close to the living quarters where the international players stayed. He vaguely made out a figure in the distance--two of them. They vanished into thin air as Hikaru parted his lips.

He felt his bones tingling when silence once again conquered the room and he flinched when the wind rattled the windows. A short moment later, Hikaru tentatively walked forward. His feet guided him to a small room where his ears started to reverberate once more, this time louder than before, suggesting that he had to find out what was behind that door.

"Locked," Muttered Hikaru, half-frustrated. "Why am I even here?" He scratched the back of his head and scoffed, turning back to walk into the elevator and start heading home. However, before he could take one more step, he heard a faint clicking noise. Under normal circumstances, he should be startled as there was no one else except for him. There was no sign of anyone inside the room either, as there was no light that spilled out of the door crevices.

Hikaru sighed after realising that he had to see this through or he would be restless for the rest of the day. So, without further objection, he pursed his lips and pushed the door open.

_"I'm such an idiot!"_

A loud gasp escaped from Hikaru's throat and he almost lost his balance after flinching. The voice was loud and clear inside his head despite it being just another fragment of his imagination. No, not imagination. Vision. It wasn't just anyone's voice. It was his but it wasn't him at the same time.

Hikaru's eyes adjusted to the darkness as he ran his hand on the rough surface of the plaster wall to find a light switch. There was a flash that made him close his eyes and when he could see clearly, Hikaru's heart constricted.

It was a kifu room, so silent and so peaceful, yet the voices wouldn't stop. It was as if turning on the light amplified the noise.

_"I should have let him play every single game! Every game! Every one!"_

Hikaru stumbled backwards and the pressure made him crumble and he crouched, hugging his knees as he bowed his head deeply like would protect him from the agonising pain metastasising in his chest. It was as if memories of pain he had never experienced before flooded into his veins and threatened to burst him.

Before Hikaru could catch up with the situation at hand, he felt moisture on his arm, his eyes became hot and his vision blurred.

_"Take me back to the beginning when I first met Sai!"_

Hikaru froze, head snapped upwards and he could somewhat make out a thin figure that soon disappeared.

It was him. It was a vision of him, crying out for Sai.

The boy slapped his mouth in an attempt to cover a whimper, but he failed. So, he let the emotion to wash over him as he sobbed.

.

When Sai awoke, he soon realised that there was no one in the room. He abruptly took a stand to look around him. There was only complete silence. Hikaru's bed was unmade, half of the blanket strewn over the floor and the pillow misplaced. As he let out a small bitter exhale, Sai trembled.

Was it over? Was this just a cruel joke played by the gods, to dangle an unobtainable in front of him?

Before Sai could let emotion to overwhelm him, he heard a loud creak of the bedroom door being opened, revealing a sweaty and dishevelled Hikaru. His hair was messy, breathing ragged and chest heaving up and down visibly. The trepidation that filled his eyes quickly faded away as a smile bloomed on his lips. His eyes glistened in the warm morning sun that leaked into the bedroom as he walked in.

"Sai," He beamed, voice bright and full of delight capable of illuminating even Sai's darkest days, shedding light into a corner of his heart that he thought was never possible. It was a smile that made him feel alive. It was an expression that was signature to his best friend, to his other half, to his student, to Hikaru.

And god, Sai didn't want to lose it.

"Come on, you've been wanting to play, right? I'll kick your ass this time." Hikaru grinned, tugging on Sai's long sleeve as he sat in front of the Go-ban, full of anticipation and excitement of a child.

A gust of alleviation seemed to blow away the weight off his shoulder, leaving him only with renewed vigour begging to be unleashed over the board. Sai had never been the one to disregard his hunch, so he sat.

For some reason unknown to him, Sai closed his eyes, smiling softly as bliss filled him from the tip of his toe to the top of his head. Gone was his worry. It was replaced with bottomless jubilance that spread from within. Something told him that this game was not the end; it was a beginning of something wonderful, a journey that he would be able to partake in.

That was a game that Sai was more than willing to play.

**Author's Note:**

> What if there is more than one universe? A multiverse where Sai doesn't disappear!  
> I wanted to play with time paradox but I thought this would be far more interesting :)
> 
> Multiverse is the theory that there exists more than one reality than the one we are living in. In short, it's an alternate reality where we made different choices in life and hence will keep on branching.  
> Here, I played around with how the gods took pity on Hikaru and decided to make Sai stay in an alternate universe.
> 
> This story was a bit troublesome to write because I want to make it interesting and immersive while not babbling. I hope I did okay...  
> Special thanks to Arrysa for helping me out!!
> 
> Please leave kudos and comments if you guys enjoyed it :)


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